Constellations

I felt very melancholy this weekend; heavy-hearted like something terrible was about to happen. You ever had that moment when you're holding your breath, hoping a moment won't come that you know will and even when it does it sparks a little terror among the butterflies in your stomach? Well that was my weekend.

At the same time, these two songs came on my MP3 player and I felt all right for the 8 minutes that they played. They made me smile. I'm sharing them with you so that they might make you smile too.

Click the play button next to each song and enjoy:

Constellations - Jack Johnson with Eddie Vedder at Kokua Festival 2007

Jack Johnson - Constellations Lyrics

The light was leaving
In the west it was blue
The children's laughter sang
And skipping just like the stones they threw
The voices echoed across the way
Its getting late

It was just another night
With the sun set
And the moon rise not so far behind
To give us just enough light
To lay down underneath the stars
Listen to papas translations
Of the stories across the sky
We drew our own constellations

The west winds often last too long
The wind may calm down
Nothing ever feels the same
Sheltered under the Kamani tree
Waiting for the passing rain
Clouds keep moving to uncover the scene
Stars above are chasing the day away
To find the stories that we sometimes need
Listen close enough
All else fades
Fades away

It was just another night
With the sun set
And the moon rise not so far behind
To give us just enough light
To lay down underneath the stars
Listen to all the translations
Of the stories across the sky
We drew our own constellations


"Breakdown" by Jack Johnson, also at the Kokua Festival

Jack Johnson - Breakdown Lyrics
I hope this old train breaks down
Then I could take a walk around
And, see what there is to see
And time is just a melody
All the people in the street
Walk as fast as their feet can take them
I just roam through town
And though my windows got a view
The frame I'm looking through
Seems to have no concern for me now
So for now I,

I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown

This engine screams out loud
Saying the beat gunna crawl westbound
So I don't even make a sound
Cause its gunna sting me when I leave this town
And all the people in the street
That I'll never get to meet
If these tracks dont bend somehow
And I got no time
That I got to get to
Where I don't need to be
So I

I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown
I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown
I wanna break on down
But I can't stop now
Let me break on down

But you cant stop nothing
If you got no control
Of the thoughts in your mind
That you kept in you know
You dont know nothing
But you dont need to know
The wisdoms in the trees
Not the glass windows
You can't stop wishing
If you dont let go
But things that you find
And you lose and you know
You keep on rolling
Put the moment on hold
The frames too bright
So put the blinds down low

And, I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown
I need this here
Old train to breakdown
Oh please just
Let me please breakdown
I wanna break on down
But I can't stop now

We Can Work It Out

I feel like I haven't totally been honest, claiming this blog is innocently for the benefit of just recollecting memories. It's also about me dealing with the death of my mother. She is dying of cancer or HIV or God knows what else. I know that sounds weird, but that's not what's important right now. I'm sure I'll go into that at some other time, but right now we are dealing with the fact that my mother spends the majority of her days in a hospital bed set up in her living room, watching anything on TLC, Food Network, and MTV. She is literally skin and bones and she is dying. I am going to need something like this blog to be able to work through what is to come. By gathering my thoughts and my memories--by whatever means possible--I think I will be able to handle it in a positive way.

We were talking today about family and a personal philosophy. I told her I believed how we were the quintessential Irish family: we work hard, we play hard, and life is hard and then you die. We talked about my two sisters and how they haven't put it all together yet. I mentioned that I thought Kelly needed to accept herself for who she is--disorders and all--and once she could, she could accept Erin and my father and everything else in life. Kelly clings to the idea of people--who or how they should be, never really accepting how they really are. Kelly is a big Beatles fan and for some reason "We Can Work It Out" kept coming into my head. Once I begin thinking of The Beatles, it's hard to stop. One of Cassidy's favorite songs is "Ticket to Ride". I will never forget her singing that song into the end of my sweatshirt string as we listened to the Bealtes tribute band at Epcot. I remember many an hour spent down in the basement of one of the Division St. houses playing with my train set and listening to Beatles 8 Tracks like "Beatles '65" and I think it was "Beatles 62-65". I remember it having a picture of the lads looking over a balcony. Many an hour of my childhood was spent listening to The Beatles and even though the lyrics don't quite fit (or maybe they do if I stop and think about it), it's no surprise that one of their tunes popped into my head as I talked about our family's strife and struggle to not just be good to each other but also to ourselves.

So here are some Beatles tunes for your listening pleasure. "We Can Work It Out" was a legitimate McCartney/Lennon collaboration and was released as a "double A-side" single along with "Day Tripper". Both songs were recorded during the Rubber Soul Sessions. I love the "Superstereo" sound of it, I could listen to the song in either ear and love it just the same. "I Feel Fine" was written by Lennon but, as was tradition, both Lennon and McCartney shared writing credit. It's from "Beatles '65, one of my favorite albums and album covers of all time. I honestly could not pick a favorite song from that album (maybe "I'm a Loser" if I was hard pressed, which I remember singing along with Paul Salamone at the top of my lungs on the playground at St. Luke's School). "I Feel Fine" makes the cut because I happen to have the song handy. "Ticket to Ride" here is from a live recording from the Sam Houston Collosseum in 1965. I chose the live version because it is a rarity and also live is how Cassidy first experienced it.

Click the play button next to each song and enjoy:
We Can Work It Out
I Feel Fine
Ticket To Ride

First Post!

I titled this blog "Memory Babe" in honor of Jack Kerouac, who was nicknamed such by his childhood friends, who were amazed at his ability to recall events and details. I am not a Memory Babe but this is my attempt, through pop culture, recollections, music, and any other thing that comes along, to not only remember events from long ago, but also preserve them for my baby girl, Cassidy (partially named for Mr. Kerouac's running buddy Neal Cassady) who just turned 3. I think there may be a call for her to look into why she is the way she is. This blog will certainly capture that, I think. I’ve been thinking about starting this blog for some time and today after talking to my sister, who seems to use her blog as a daily diary, it seemed like a good time.

I got a little taste of my childhood today courtesy of Wal-Mart of all places. As I was shopping, I saw they had put out "fresh" food in the warmer. It being lunch time and seeing the long lines ahead of me, I checked it out. Wouldn't you know it, lo and behold, there was a fried hot apple pie!

For those of you born pre-1992 when the baked apple pie replaced the fried apple pie at McDonald's, you'll remember the crunchy outside, the searing hot, burn the roof of your mouth so bad you don't know if you're eating crust or skin inside. I don't know if this was what Sam Walton envisioned when he said you should "Deliver more than you promise", but yum yum! this delivered not only a delicious snack, but also a childhood flashback, which made the 45 minute wait in line bearable.

I grew up on Division St. in Schenectady, NY. We lived in 3 different flats on the same street for a total of 10 years. Two of the houses were "at the top of the street" and the last one we lived in was "at the bottom of the street" (there was a big hill in the middle). At the end of the street if you crossed State (which was a lot like playing human Frogger), there was a McDonald's. We were way too poor to ever get to eat at McD's, but every year at Halloween a popular thing to give the kids was coupons for a free hot fudge sundae or a hot apple pie (I think the coupons were part of a charity thing). I always traded my sisters for their hot apple pie coupons and for two weeks straight was able to go down and grab a hot apple pie. You know how good apple pie is on a crisp fall afternoon? Now imagine how good a hot apple pie from McDonald's is on a crisp fall afternoon to a poor kid who only ate them for two weeks out of the year.

So we begin: a Kerouac reference, I drop Frogger on you, AND talk about being a poor kid in Schenectady who was happy anytime he could have a hot apple pie from McDonald's. Now you know Cassidy, why you are like you are ;-)